You love the person you are with and yet the arguments and negative emotions are hurting you and the relationship. Why is this happening? How did things get so unpleasant?  Why do we sometimes walk into a relationship with beautiful dreams and an innocent heart and later find ourselves in a situation that we never intended?

This will be very hard to read for some of you, but…it is always your fault! Granted, not necessarily consciously, but always your responsibility none the less and this in itself is the good news. The instant you understand that this is your doing, your Power immediately returns to you. You get out of the victim and helpless mode and into the creator and designer mode. A relationship is a wonderful vehicle that lets you know what exactly you are attracting and why. Here are some ways to keep an eye out:

If the relationship is new, less than a couple of months, by this time you will be able to recall little hints and signs that you registered and allowed through in your field. Things like odd subjects with negative connotations, or little habits that you disagree with, or behaviors that you are tolerant of now, but perceive them borderline to you, etc. There will always be these signs, you will always notice them and it will be up to you to consciously slow the relationship’s progress for further observation or to ignore them and continue attracting the undesired energy.

If the relationship is stable, this means your friends and family recognize you as a couple, by this time the little hints and signs have grown to solid situations you deal with as the relationship advances. Things at this stage are in the process of creating something together, like a solid relationship, life, marriage, household, etc. This is the time to think ahead and consider that life is always evolving and that you and your environment will change as time progresses. This relationship is one of the vehicles you will use for years to come. In this stage your intuition and your heart will speak. The inner communication will feel as peace and security within the relationship or as doubt and and a sense of looking out for yourself only. Dreams and passions will either be shared and encouraged by your partner or will be there but will feel very far because in your heart you’ll know that the person next to you will never enjoy, understand or approve of them; and most importantly, has the power to stop you from ever achieving them.

If the Relationship is mature, you have already gotten used to the shared lifestyle. If you were true to yourself in the first two stages, then you welcome the challenges of sharing your life with another free willed human being, you are aware that you are not always right, you also know when you are. Both, your significant other and you, have gone through some ups and downs and it has helped you both grow. At this stage you know that some dreams are not worth pursuing, and if you look deep within, you see that they are dreams of the ego not of your heart. If you find yourself in this level, you know that you are part of something bigger than just yourself. On the negative end, if you allowed life to drag you this far, inevitably, there will be resentment within you. This emotion may be directed towards your significant other, or it may spill towards people that are loving, caring or kind to you; worse it may simmer within you creating health or emotional conditions.

Regardless, you are never too late change your path. Your Power never abandons you, it is always there once you start living everyday consciously and assume responsibility for everything that comes your way regarding relationships.

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